Snake pit

I haven’t been able to sleep in 48 hours because my sister informed me that she wants my husband and me to move out and because an old friend of mine passed away. Then, my sister takes me aside before she goes to bed and tells me she has decided that we can stay but only if we have no where to go and if this will cause us to live in our car. Then she tells me that she hates her husband and takes two sleeping pills and goes to bed. I’m left standing in the hallway stunned, not by her declaration of hate towards her husband but stunned because I finally understand what makes my sister tick. It boils down to two things. First, when she is mad at her husband she treats me like a friend and confidant. When life is smooth and her husband treats her well (translation: blows sunshine up her butt and acts like her slave) she turns on me with a vengeance. Why she can’t just be content and why she needs to always be angry with someone is beyond me. She has never been accountable for anything in her life so maybe this is her way of not taking the blame for her transgressions. Second, she needs me around to have someone to complain to and clean her house.

Once again, I get the crap scared out of me only for my sister to turn the tables around. This is the second time she’s done this and I’m not taking it too well. The goodness inside of me is wearing away and I have thoughts of revenge lurking in my heart. I’ve never felt such anger towards a sibling or anyone for that matter and it scares me. I have enough secrets about both my sister and BIL that I could really, really put them in a scary predicament. So the temptation hounds me daily. I’ve got to get out of here soon. My husband and I need a safe and peaceful place to lay our heads at night not this viper pit of a home.