Why...why does it always boil down to money? I handle everything in my life, the hardships the mental anguish, every evil thing that touches my life with quiet dignity but I never seem to have the financial backing to live even the most austere life. I'm tired. I'm getting too old for this life style. I need some semblance of security. I"m not going to make it. This is too much. After everything...everything I've suffered. Where do I go from here?